i won't bore you with details and ramblings about the last three months though. but i do want to talk about something that's been on my mind a lot today.
it's such a big word. not in length. in meaning.
here are a few of the ways that webster's dictionary defines the word broken:
- violently separated into parts : shattered
- damaged or altered by breaking
- having undergone or been subjected to fracture
- interrupted or full of obstacles
- violated by transgression
- disrupted by change
- made weak or infirm
- crushed, sorrowful
- cut off : disconnected
- not complete or full
i've been thinking about the concept of grace all afternoon.
i have such a hard time with it. i have difficulty extending it. sometimes i have difficulty accepting it. not from man, but from God. why do i struggle so much to accept His grace? why is it so hard for me to offer grace to others?
i think that often it's because i don't think others are deserving of it. but isn't that the exact definition of grace? receiving something that you don't deserve under any circumstances? having something that you should not?
i've been thinking today that i am broken. i've talked with a few friends lately that are the same way.
none of us are whole. we all have holes inside of us that we try to fill. we try to fix us. we've all heard it said that "you can't fix stupid." something i've determined today? YOU can't fix what's broken. I can't fix what's broken. and you know what? that person sitting next to you in church? yeah, she can't fix what's broken. the man sitting down the pew from you? he can't fix broken either. we can try all we want. we can't do it.
but He can.
through His grace, and His grace alone, we can become whole again.
Psalm 147:3 - He heals the broken heartedHe alone is good to all that love Him.
and binds up their wounds.
Psalm 145:8-20 - The Lord is merciful and compassionate,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
The Lord is good to everyone.
He showers compassion on all his creation.
All of your works will thank you, Lord,
and your faithful followers will praise you.
They will speak of the glory of your kingdom;
they will give examples of your power.
They will tell about your mighty deeds
and about the majesty and glory of your reign.
For your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom.
You rule throughout all generations.
The Lord always keeps his promises;
he is gracious in all he does.
The Lord helps the fallen
and lifts those bent beneath their loads.
The eyes of all look to you in hope;
you give them their food as they need it.
When you open your hand,
you satisfy the hunger and thirst of every living thing.
The Lord is righteous in everything he does;
he is filled with kindness.
The Lord is close to all who call on him,
yes, to all who call on him in truth.
He grants the desires of those who fear him;
he hears their cries for help and rescues them.
The Lord protects all those who love him,
but he destroys the wicked.